Tuesday, December 14, 2010

What's Happening Here?!?!?

Hungry...this is what I've felt for the most part of the day. Why? There are many reasons. This my friends is me STARTING to fall off the wagon. I say STARTING because even as I type this I know what needs to be done to prevent this.
As I walked to my nearest Starbucks and bought a bagel and cream cheese, not toasted, as this would waste time and I just wanted to hurry up and eat it, I was thinking, should I really eat this? Am I really hungry? I let myself have a a big dinner last night, I should not do this, especially if I'm not that hungry. Is this the beginning of the end? Am I going to see my 10 pounds creep back on? First one pound, then two, sure I can lose those, but will I let it get out of hand? Why am I doing this when I know everything that needs to be done to keep the weight off?!?!? How am I going to end this viscous cycle?! How did this even happen? Sure, you may think, it's just one bagel and cream cheese, but last night it was just one heavy Indian meal, yesterday's lunch was just one big bowl of pasta etc. If it were just ONE thing, I would not be writing this post.
No, I am writing this post to let you guys know what starts the process of falling off the wagon. I've realized it all comes down to poor planning. I have not worked out since last week. Why? I've had an eye infection and don't like working out with my glasses on. This is the first of losing my good habits. What will I do to fix this? Suck it up for thirty minutes and get back on the stair master.
Why have I been hungry? Poor planning on my part again. I should have brought more healthy snacks at work to get through til my next meal. My fruit bowl is empty when it should be full. Instead, what's happened is, I get really hungry and will go for the first unhealthy snack I find at work, then I won't stop. The psycho in me comes out and I will just eat all I can. As I write all this, I've eaten half of the bagel and cream cheese.
That's it. That's all that needs to be done. Suck it up and get my thirty minutes of cardio in. Continue to bring my healthy snacks and lunches in. Remember that being healthy is more important than weight loss. Eating right and exercising automatically bring in the weight loss.
I "accidentally" dropped the other half of my bagel and cream cheese...and I feel just fine.
Am I falling off the wagon? No, it was a bit shaky, but I'm still on.

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